Dorm Tales: Umpire

I thought St. John's School for the Deaf ought to have its own Little League team, heading to Williamsport to defeat the Japanese but the boys are all on vacation. I gotten figured this out, so our Cub Scouts field a softball team, calling up all the other Packs to come down and play against us, having local businesses donate uniforms and equipment, and using nuns as cheerleaders. McDonald's area franchisees donated the water coolers. A local theater gave us tickets to the "The Bad News Bears." The only differences between the coach in the movie and me is that he drinks beer on the mound, and I drinks Coca-Cola in the dugout. It doesn't matter if we win or not, we are still having pizzas delivered to us. One Deaf boy threw a bat at me after striking out, giving me the finger. One teacher bought in a friend who is a professional umpire in the minor leagues, one hit an infield pop up fly-ball and it was an automatic out even though he reaches first base safely. I learn something new that night. One parent came up to me and told me that his son was planning to quit SJSD and go to WSD, but he changes his mind because he wants to stay on our team. None of my boys ever made it to the Major Leagues, although a few of them, while at Gallaudet, steals the national spotlight, jumping unto the field in Baltimore, ripping off their shirts, honoring Brewers' Robin Yount 3,000 hits, during a live broadcast.