Deaf Anthology # 150: "Times Square"

Deaf Anthology have a full day planned for you guys wanting to celebrate New Years in the tri-states area. Here's our internaries.

First of all we will meet 9 am at the Danbury Lanes (7 East Hayestown Rd. Danbury, Ct.) for a day of Duckpin bowling. After three games we head to New York City. (we recommend carpooling)

Then we will go see "Yes Man" an open-captioned movie, starring Jim Carrey, a comedy at 12:55 pm at the Regal Battery Park (102 N. End Ave.) Stadium 11 Cinema.

Afterwards, we head down to Manhattan to Carnegie Deli (854 Seventh Ave.) for their corned beef briskets on rye, potato knish, and of course the cheesecake.

At 5:30, we should be at the Ed Sullivan Theatre (1697 Broadway), to take in a taping of the Late Show with David Letterman (a Deaf intern from Gallaudet was hired recently). If you don't have a ticket, call (212) 247-6497 after 11 am and don't forget to request that CBS provide you with an ASL interpreter. Tip: If you want David Letterman's autograph send a fax to Susan Kolenovic at (212) 975-4734.

Afterwards we'll go skating at the Rockeffeller Center's ice rink. (prepare to absorb bruises)

We'll then check in at the Casablanca Hotel (147 W. 43rd St.) in time for their wine and cheese reception. they are famous for their Middle Eastern hospitality, a terrorists hangout, just kidding. (yes, breakfast buffet is included in the rake rate)

We'll then head to Times Square, "Crossroads of the World", where all the excitements are, so let's party and celebrate New Years. (don't forget that one of us must be a designated driver in case the rest of us are drunk, capture the memories with your cellphone video, in case anyone of us have a hangover and doubt ever streaking through the crowd)

We have selected the Bubba Gum's Shrimp Co. (1501 Broadway, you need reservations) as the place to party on from 9 pm 'till 2 am as an excellent place to view the famous ball dropped, a tradition. At 11:38, Jonas Brothers will performed on Nivea Countdown Stage. At 11:55, Pepsi will release 1,000 3 foot balloon balls upon the revelers to bounce around. After midnight we'll be buried in confetti. At 11:59, we begin the countdown in seconds to watch the famous BALL dropped. (Hope you will find your way back to the Cablanca Hotel)

We'll start off the New Year's with a Polar Bear plunge at Sandy Hook in New Jersey. We'll have a cookout at the lighthouse. (don't complaint about the frigid artic air, if you can have a tailgate party at Giants/Jets game, then you'll survive here, we'll have a pick-up game of flag football)

That's it, Happy New Year from Deaf Anthology. (e-mail us your photos and we will post it on our blog)

Revised 12/30/08

This is Smokey, stay tuned for the next episode of Deaf Anthology. Good night, Deaf America!

Deaf Anthology # 149: "Las Vegas"

Among the Deaf, Las Vegas remains a popular destination, some hit the jackpot on the one-arm bandits. A few Deaf blackjack dealers (don't expect favoritism) in the casinos. One of the obvious losers are a Deaf organization that put a huge sum (just hope you didn't registerred for their upcoming national convention) in a bank account that isn't FDIC insured when it collapse, will the government bail them out, I doubt it, but maybe they will have had better odds on roulette. Anyway, you remember seeing those commercials, "What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas." Apparently we have a new spokesperson to testify to that effect.

Revised 12/29/08

This is Smokey, stay tuned for the next episode of Deaf Anthology. Good night, Deaf America!

Deaf Anthology # 148: "Remember Me"

This film was produced by a 15 years old girl, Lizzie Palmer, and have gotten over 3,000,000 hits. She herself planning on joining the army after graduating from high school. She was interviewed yesterday on Fox's Sunday News. Our freedoms have been taken for granted, we Deaf know someone in the military, serving our country in Afghanistan and Iraq, we ought not to forget them in our thoughts. This film is an inspiration to us all. We are proud to be an American.

Deaf Anthology dedicated this blog to our troops.
Revised 12/29/08

This is Smokey, stay tuned for the next episode of Deaf Anthology. Good night, Deaf America!

Deaf Anthology # 147: "Texting and Driving"

Texting and driving? Just take a good look of five teenagers above, they all died when Bailey Goodman, 17, was driving her SUV, while texting, which swerved into oncoming traffic, colliding with a tractor-trailer. What a waste, these popular high school cheerleaders just graduated five days earlier. Some Deaf, as one Blogger on Deafread have just mentioned it, that it is discrimatory. Distraction is a major cause of accidents.

89% of Americans support laws banning texting while driving. At least 18 states have laws in effect, others are considering it.

16% of American teenagers have admitted that they were texting while driving. The AAA have determined that texting increased the chances of being in an accident 50%.

Revised 12/29/08

This is Smokey, stay tuned for the next episode of Deaf Anthology. Good night, Deaf America!

Deaf Anthology # 146: "Deaf Polar Bear Plunge"

The annual Deaf Polar Bare Plunge at Crescent Rock Beach in south Surrey, B.C. Those coming to this event are reminded to stay on the beach path and keep off the train tracks for their own personal safety. A record of this swim with a list of participants will be forwarded to the Guinness World Records for their consideration as the world's largest polar bear plunge. The Deaf Polar Bare Plunge starts at 1:00 pm on New Year's Day. Registration is free and begins at 11:30 a.m. First 250 Deaf will received a free t-shirt (logo of a bear with a surfboard shown below), courtesy of the local Canadian relay service. Families with children are encouraged to participate, a great way of bonding to kick-off the new year. Of course, everyone is welcome to watch the history in the making. Secure sandals or aqua shoes are recommended for the somewhat rocky shore leading to the sand flats.
Smokey wouldn't be there this year but congratulates those Deaf who are brave enough to participate in this worthwhile charity event, free hot cocoa will be served. Bring a can of soup, we will combined them all and cook them over a campfire on the beach, they will provide us with instant warmth , chatting while huddling together. I will suffered frostbite once I bare myself in the frigid, artic air. If you are unable to make it to Canada, then check out your local bars, several sponsored such events, and give-away t-shirts, just don't call in sick afterward for coming down with a flu. Revised 12/27/08

This is Smokey, stay tuned for the next episode of Deaf Anthology. Good night, Deaf America!

Deaf Anthology # 145: "Dancing with the Stars"

Since that Marlee Matlin had her chances on "Dancing with the Stars", been eliminated but next season is guarantee to be a ratings blockbuster for ABC with these couple, former adversaries have agreed to make up, and dance away the night, as a sign of unity. Marlee Matlin may have a few tips for them, their spouses seem to don't mind their publicity stunts. In the meantime, they better keep their day job as their fame may be short-lived. Don't you agreed that this couple is a winner. Let's dance!

Revised 12/26/08

This is Smokey, stay tuned for the next episode of Deaf Anthology. Good night, Deaf America!

Deaf Anthology # 144: "Deaf Santa"

Deaf Anthology was able to obtained an exclusive interview with the Deaf Santa at the North Pole.

Q: "Why you used rooftops?"

A: "I once was ticketed on the street for violating municipal winter parking rules."

Q: "How did you become Deaf?"

A: "Not wearing ear-muffs on Christmas Eve."

Q: "Were that you at the mall?"

A: "Yes, thanks to cloning technology, I was able to appear everywhere."

Q: "What are you giving to President Bush this year?"

A: "A pair of shoes."

Q: "Does your Deaf elves makes all the toys?"

A: "No, we import some, the rest from Wal-Mart."

Q: "Why does Rudolph have a red nose?"

A: "FAA regulations."

Q: "Why do you live at the North Pole?"

A: "It's a tax heaven!"

Q: "How many children you have?"

A: "So far, 144,000 due to numerous requests for a baby brother or sister."

Q: "How's your health?"

A: "My doctor told me that I have high cholesterol due to all that milk and cookies."

Q: "How's is Mrs. Claus?"

A: "Great! Viagra saved our marriage." (smile)

Q: "Any hazards driving your sled throughout the world?"

A: "Almost got shot down by a Russian MiG."

Q: "Who's been naughty?"

A: "The Illinois Governor Blagojevich trying to bribe me with a Senate seat for a Daisy BB rifle he didn't get as a child."

Q: "One final question, what do you planning to do after you done your rounds?

A: "I am going to hit the beach, go surfing in Hawaii." (laughter)

Revised 12/26/08

This is Smokey, stay tuned for the next episode of Deaf Anthology. Good night, Deaf America!

Deaf Anthology 143: "Deaf Elves"

Santa is still busy getting ready for Christmas Eve, the Deaf elves are almost done making new toys for all the Deaf children around the world. At this moment, Santa is checking the list, making sure he's not missing anyone. Sometimes the Deaf elves will ride with Santa on Christmas eve. However, it is not every year that we have a full moon, so how can they communicate in sign language when it is pitch black, that's why they selected Rudolph, the red nose reindeer to lead the pack. Santa Claus have recently installed a videophone so that Deaf children may contact him directly.

Revised 12/22/08

This is Smokey, stay tuned for the next episode of Deaf Anthology. Good night, Deaf America!

Deaf Anthology # 142: "Extra"

Right now I am pretending to have a "writer's block," rather than leaving a blank blog, I am making up excuses as to why this one should not be on the front page, and end up on "Extra." The only reason I can think of is so that I can keep the Deafread human editors busy. "Bandit (the pet raccoon) , get off the keyboards!"

I realized that you may be bored today when you click on this blog but at least you got some entertainment (smile) here.

Revised 12/22/08

This is Smokey, stay tuned for the next episode of Deaf Anthology. Good night, Deaf America!

Deaf Anthology # 141: "Blizzard"

There is a blizzard, your Deaf children are exciting, schools are closed, now a great opportunity to get together as a family in front of a fireplace, wait a minute, don't have a fireplace, no problem, just snuggled together in front of your computer screen, and relive the moments of Christmas past. Feel the warmth and smell the baked ham being prepared. Sing and Sign Christmas Carols. Build a
snowman, afterwards watch a classic video "Miracle on 34th Street." Santa working on your list to fulfill all your wishes. Happy Holidays from us all at Deaf Anthology at the North Pole.

Revised 12/19/08

This is Smokey, stay tuned for the next episode of Deaf Anthology. Good night, Deaf America!

Deaf Anthology # 140: "Tishia's Second Thoughts"

EEK! Deaf Anthology became concerned when Tishia, a Deaf mother from Missouri, reportedly have problems with mice invading her home. I send a camera crew down to see how bad the situation is, it is unbelievable, a cat's nightmare.Tishia is having second thoughts about living here, after desperate calls to all the local exterminators that won't even take the job. What's she going to do, call ghostbuster (I meant mousebuster), having the worst case of murophobia. Her home insurance doesn't cover her claims, citing a natural disaster clause of biblical plagues. A million mousetraps wouldn't do it, as it will bankrupt the cheese manufactures keeping up with demands. Maybe they ought to nuke her home, it will be decades of radioactive fallout before Extreme Makeover can come to their rescue, providing if they are still on the air. Hold it, my film crew just got back, so here is a video taken at Tishia's home.

Revised 12/19/08

This is Smokey, stay tuned for the next episode of Deaf Anthology. Good night, Deaf America!

Deaf Anthology # 139: "Secret Service"

A Deaf Secret Service agent assigned to protect President Bush wasn't in Baghdad when the shoe incident occurred because he was in Chicago working with the transitional team. Now he's in training at the James J. Rowley facility in Laurel, Maryland to prevent such incident from ever happening again. Deaf Anthology was able to obtain the software used in their program, I wouldn't aim at a room full of reporters, unless they are all lobbyists. Wouldn't it be much simpler if the White House requires all take off their shoes and leave them outside as they do at the mosque, sure it will stink up the press conferences. It would be an excellent commercial for an air freshener. Tonight Show Jay Leno quipped that "President Bush is good at (laugh track) dodgeball. We ought to go out and buy stock of that shoe manufacture, it will be the number #1 seller, especially in the Arab world. I last time we missed out on a great opportunity is when Alan Shepard refused to identify the golf ball he used on the moon, still somewhere out there in space. "There will be a team of agents on the mall during the inaugural, you can recognize the Deaf one as being without an earplug. When asked about the shoe incident, he laughed it off stating that if he caught it (a size 10) , he would have sold it on e-bay now that there are so much interests enough to retire on. The Deaf first was hired to do a simple task, to burn worn out currency, and jump at the opportunity to protect the President, "I think the TV series Sue Thomas, FBI, may have influences his superiors that emphasis diversity within the department.

This article is dedicated to "Deep Throat," Malt Felt (not Linda Lovelace, mind you), a FBI agent who died yesterday that brought down the Nixon administration after "Watergate."

Anyway, if you have nothing else to do, let's play this game, you score points for every shoes you shot down, just don't aim at the President, alright!

Revised 12/19/08
This is Smokey, stay tuned for the next episode of Deaf Anthology. Good night, Deaf America!

Deaf Anthology # 138: "Tayler Mayer"

Stop the press, Time magazine made a mistake, they got it wrong, Barack Obama isn't the "Person of the Year," it was an oversight, so corrections have to be made. Deaf Anthology wishes to congratuate Tayler Mayer of Deafread fame being choosen "Person of the Year."

Tayler Mayer: "I am deeply honored, at first I thought it was a joke until I saw myself on the Time cover at the localnewstand." (LOL)

Deaf Anthology is just one of the hundreds of Deaf blogs/vlogs on Deafread, imagine a world without Tayler Mayer being there to create awesome outlet for us to express overselves over the internet.

Revised 12/18/08
This is Smokey, stay tuned for the next episode of Deaf Anthology. Good night, Deaf America!